Sweet as Dirt
by TheHotness
Summary: Holes Camp Green Lake becomes co-ed. How will the boys handle these strange new arrivals. (has no real plot yet -- hooray!) CHAP 10 IS FINALLY UP
1. Integration

Disclaimer - I don't own any of the Holes characters (unfortunately. how cool would that be to own them?!), I think they should be credited to Louis Sachar. And I don't own any of my friends. except maybe myself. Hmmm do I own myself? In that case I guess all my friends own themselves too.  
  
Special thanks to everyone who's ever seen Holes with me, particularly Q for her ever obsessive stalkish behavior =)  
  
Squid rushed into the wreck room and bounded over to the pool table, which the boys of D-tent were surrounding. It was obvious by the excited look in his eyes that he had important news to share with the group, but he was so winded he had to take a few breaths before he could begin. The boys stopped their game, and stared at him anxiously.  
  
Finally, he pulled the toothpick out from between his teeth and drawled, "There's a girl. in Camp Green Lake!"  
  
"What, you mean like the warden," Stanley asked innocently.  
  
"No, man, a girl! Like, our age. a new camper!"  
  
"But this ain't no girl's camp! They can't bring in no girls here," Armpit sighed, not hopeful enough to think that a real girl could be entering Camp Green Lake.  
  
"I bet she's a robot," Zigzag interjected, his hair sticking on end (maybe it was just turned on by the thought of a girl), "Yeah, she's designed to mess with our heads. that's all girls ever do. It's the warden's evil mind game."  
  
Squid shook his head, "Naw, I'm tellin' you. she's a-" He was cut off by a gunshot from the outside, followed my a loud fit of high pitched screaming.  
  
"Did- did Mr.Sir just shoot 'er?" Magnet worried.  
  
"Well, she didn't last long," X-Ray shook his head.  
  
All of the boys clamored outside to get a better look at the scene. What they found there was not a dying girl, but rather a feisty, lively one. She was very short, just over 5ft, the size of their shovels. Her hair was cut short in the back, with longer bits in the front, and she was already in her camp clothes - an orange jumpsuit.  
  
It was pretty obvious what the gunshot had been, for a headless yellow spotted lizard was lying, limbs still twitching, on the ground between the girl and Mr.Sir. But the girl was in a fit, screaming at the counselor, "It's an animal and it has rights too! You can't just go shooting the head off any other creature on this planet just cause it's not a human. Animals have feelings. They have lives. and they have every right to live them! It's disgusting the way you mistreat the poor creatures of this earth who have just as much reason to life as you have. The poor thing never hurt you any!"  
  
"It was going to kill you. Being bit by a yellow spotted lizard, that's the worst thing that can happen to you. You will d-"  
  
"Die a slow and painful death. Always. Yeah, yeah, I know. Cut the crap, there is no justifying taking the life of another living being. You are a MURDERER!" the girl spat.  
  
Mr.Sir felt a huge blow to his ego and authority, as he realized all the boys had been standing on the porch watching this girl talk him down. He cleared his throat, spit out the sunflower seed shells he'd been chewing on, and simply ended it by saying, "Come on."  
  
But the girl didn't want to let it go, "What, don't want to debate anymore? Can't stick up for your side, huh? Yeah, then maybe you should stop killing poor defenseless-"  
  
"COME ON, missy. I have half a mind to." Mr.Sir's voice trailed off into a grumble. He walked away, and the girl followed him, with her arms crossed in defensive anger.  
  
X-Ray slapped Squid playfully on the back of the head as all the boys turned to go back inside. There was an audible murmur of disbelief and mixed first impressions in the crowd. Eventually, Stanley and Zero were the only two to remain outside.  
  
"Well," Stanley said, not really knowing what else to add to it.  
  
"I don't know, man, a girl at Camp Green Lake," Zero said shaking his head, summing up fairly well the feelings of all the boys.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
That night they were all called into the mess hall early, and told to take a seat. They all had guessed what it was about. After a minute the warden herself walked into the room, boots clicking rhythmically on the wooden floor.  
  
"I have some exciting news for you boys," she smirked, "Camp Green Lake will now be integrated. We accepted our first female today. She's a fairly umm. manly girl, just to help us get used to things until we expand. She will be staying in a ten of her own, the girls tent, know as G-Tent, which you boys are not permitted, under any circumstances, to enter. I expect you all to take this new adjustment well," she paused for emphasis, "and I hope to hear of no trouble following this decision. You hear me? Well good then, boys, have a nice meal. You'll need the strength." And with that said, she clicked her way out of the room.  
  
Pendanski added a moment later, "Her name's Laney. I expect all of you to help make her feel welcome," and not really sure what else to say, he walked awkwardly out of the room.  
  
A few minutes later the girl, Laney, walked in, accompanied by Mr.Sir, who told her gruffly, "This is where you get the grub. Better eat well, tomorrow's gonna be a rough day." He grunted, and then walked over to the counter (cutting all the kids in line) to obtain his own food.  
  
Laney walked towards the food moments later, and the boys who had been in line parted ways to let her pass. They heard her laugh slightly at this, though she tried to muffle it.  
  
The boy behind the counter began to scoop a pile of slop onto her plate, but she stopped him, "What's in that?" she asked. The room went silent. The boys knew the way things worked here. You never back-talked Mr.Sir (a rule she had already broken) and you always eat what you're given, no questions asked. They boy didn't know what to tell her (probably cause he had no idea what was in the crap either), so he called the head cook, an older man, over to deal with Laney.  
  
"What do you want? Causing trouble already won't get you on good terms with the Warden. I'd watch it," he told her.  
  
She disregarded his comment, and asked again, very politely, "What's in the food?"  
  
"I. well, now. I can't disclose that info, but I suggest you best eat it up. It's food, ain't that good enough for ya?"  
  
"I don't eat meat. do you know if it has animal in it?" she asked steadily.  
  
"Well, I suppose the only thing that I can assure you has no meat in it is the bread, but you're only allowed two pieces. You'd better eat more'n that... ah, the hell with it, why am I wasting time on you? You'll eat what you're given, and you'll damn well swallow it all," he was frustrated. Never before had a kid caused ANY problems with his cooking! Who did she think she was?  
  
All the boys were watching the two of them now, holding their breaths, waiting for Laney's response. Was she going to flip out on the cook, same as she had Mr.Sir this morning? Would he stand for it? Pendanski, Mr.Sir, and the warden had all left the room so there was no furthur supervision. Maybe *now* the girl was going to die, they thought.  
  
But it ended up fairly anticlimactically. Laney simply handed him her empty try, grabbed two slices of bread from the loaf in front of her, and said, "Thanks," and walked over to a table.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
None of the boys sat with her at the table, for they didn't know exactly how to handle this new arrival. When a new boy arrived they'd usually ass him a little bit. Break him in until he was ready to be nicknamed and become, officially, one of the gang. But that couldn't do that with a girl!  
  
The majority of dinner was silent, as each of the boys was lost in their own thoughts, but every so often someone would speak up.  
  
"She's weird," Squid decided.  
  
"I don't know what's up with all this crap she's trying to pull, causing a ruckus in the dinner line, yelling about lizards," X-Ray shook his head, "I don't know, man."  
  
"I bet she was sent by the government to test out the camp. An undercover agent. yeah! To rustle up the warden's feathers, see if she'll crack. The government's onto this camp you know," Zigzag suggested.  
  
"Man, they don't have no 15 year old agents," X-Ray countered.  
  
"Maybe she just likes animals," Magnet guessed.  
  
Armpit just shook his head, "Dawg, she's a fool."  
  
When dinner had ended, all the boys stood up to leave, but Laney remained at her table, to let them all exit first. Her stomach rumbled slightly with hunger, but she figured if she held out long enough, the cook would HAVE to start making a vegetarian option for her. Or if not, she'd get so sickly she'd at least be able to leave the camp.  
  
Zero walked out behind Caveman, last to leave as usual. He had been careful to make sure no one had been watching him during dinner as he snuck his bread onto his lap under the table, and he was careful now to make sure that no one noticed as he slipped the two slices onto the table next to Laney. Even she hadn't noticed, until her hand fell upon the two extra pieces.  
  
When she looked up to see where they had come from, all she saw was a small figure with puffy hair disappearing through the door.  
  
Wow, that girl's kind of a brat. who would ever be SO politically correct, geez! Heh heh ;) Hmmm, I wish this story had a plot, but I guess I'll just keep bringing in characters and go from there. This is destined to be another story I start and never end. = P 


	2. Hotness

NOTE: wow, updating a chapter a day, I don't think I'll keep up with the pace for long. Specially with exams coming up, blah! Thanks for the reviews - they totally inspire me =). Much love and shovels... and onions!  
  
The blaring horn sounded, waking all the campers up to a cool morning. They rubbed their sleepy eyes open, and stretched out sore muscles. A few pulled blankets over their heads to try and postpone the inevitable day ahead. Just like every day.  
  
"Think they'll make 'er dig?" Magnet inquired  
  
"Naw, man, she's a *girl*," Squid shrugged, "Diggin's a man's job."  
  
X-Ray picked up his pillow and swung it squarely into Squid's head, "Come on, boys, time to work."  
  
Sure enough, when they arrived outside Laney was standing there with the rest of them waiting to pick up a shovel. Pendanski could be heard shouting some crap about energy and strength. No one wanted to listen though; it was too damn early. Finally all the campers had gathered, so Mr.Sir opened the tool shed and they all clambered over to pick up their shovels.  
  
X-Ray noticed, just a moment to late, that Laney had taken his special shovel. It was shorter than the rest of them ("smaller shovel, smaller hole") and he wondered to himself why *every* new camper accidentally picked up his shovel. Normally, he would grab the shovel out of the boy's hand, make sure he learned his lesson. But could he do that to a girl?  
  
"Hey man, don't she have your shovel?" Squid asked.  
  
"Yeah, yeah..." was all X-Ray could say, too deep in thought about how to handle the delicate situation.  
  
"Aren't you gonna take it back? Teach 'er the way around here? Aren't scared of a girl are ya?" Squid prodded, curious to see what would happen if he could cause a scene between X-Ray and the new girl.  
  
"No, man, I just don't know if I should, ya know, cause problems with the new kid."  
  
"Never had a problem with it before," Squid urged him.  
  
"Yeah, but it's different cause-" he stammered for a second.  
  
"Because I'm a girl?" Laney, who had apparently been listening the whole time, finished for him.  
  
X-Ray tried to respond, but he just stuttered a little, embarrassed at being caught talking about her, which amused Squid to no end. He laughed heartily and slapped X-Ray on the back before walking away.  
  
Laney smiled crookedly and lifted her eyebrows, "It's a shovel," she said, handing over X-Ray's shovel to him, and grabbing out of his hand the one he was holding, "better?"  
  
He chuckled, "Heh, yeah... sorry about that. The name's X-Ray," he held out his hand.  
  
She returned the firm grip, "Laney, but I'm sure you already knew that." Mr. Sir interrupted their conversation by cracking a shovel against the side of the tool shed.  
  
"Come on you Girl scou-" he paused in the middle of his usual insult, embarrassed that he could no longer use gender as an slur, "Move it."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The morning cool had worn off, and had turned into a day so hot that it weighed heavily on the bodies of all the diggers. They had quickly gulped down all their water, and it was almost possible to feel the relief in the air when the water truck appeared in the distance.  
  
They all jumped out of their half dug holes in anticipation. Magnet finally decided to try to be friendly to the girl, and reached out his hand as he walked past her hole, "First day's the hardest," he told her.  
  
She grabbed his hand and pulled herself out of the hole, while grunting in agreement, "Thanks, I sure hope so, haha." She turned over her hand to expose blistering sliced up palms. Magnet inspected them approvingly.  
  
"Oh yeah, I'm Magnet."  
  
She smiled, "Nice to meet you, Magnet." He then took her over to the line of boys that was now waiting for the approaching truck, and introduced them each.  
  
"X-Ray," he introduced first.  
  
"Yeah, we already met. How goes the first day?"  
  
"It goes," she shrugged.  
  
"Squid, and Armpit" he introduced next, followed by, "Zigzag." Squid nodded a greeting, and Armpit uttered a "hey", but Zigzag just stared at her with large, suspicious eyes. "And Caveman, and Zero," he finished off the line. Caveman smiled and shook her hand, and Zero looked at her briefly, but said nothing. With the introductions done, Laney took her place at the back of the line as the truck finally pulled up to the boys, and Mr. Sir jumped out.  
  
Laney was standing directly behind Zero, and as she looked at his profile she felt a sense of recognition. Then she remembered why.  
  
"Hey, you gave me your bread yesterday, didn't you?" She asked him. He didn't respond.  
  
"Yo, Zero, he's a little um... out of the box, you know? He don't talk to no one but Caveman here," Armpit informed. She nodded to him to signify that she understood, and he turned back around in line.  
  
Inconspicuously, she leaned towards Zero and whispered, "Thanks."  
  
The line began to move foreword as Mr. Sir filled the jugs up. As each boy passed, he received a sandwich - ham and cheese. When Laney finally reached the front of the line, she declined the sandwich, "Your cook should know I don't eat meat. Take it back, get me something vegetarian."  
  
The boys all stopped and stared at the scene. This girl was quite the entertainment.  
  
"Now, I don't know what you think you're up to little missy, but you will eat the food you're given here at Camp Green Lake or you won't eat at all."  
  
"Fine," she said, "but I'm already pretty hungry from not eating last night. If you *really* want the authorities checking in on the camp when I starve..."  
  
"Who do you think you are? Want special privileges cause you're a girl, do you?"  
  
"No, I want special privileges cause I'm a vegetarian. Maybe if you started to diversify your food some of the boys would be happy to eat vegetarian as well. If you want to turn this into a sexist matter then I suggest-"  
  
"All right, enough. God damn selfish kids always expecting me to break my back for them. jesus. Those little mother..." he trailed off. He walked away without saying more, the last ham sandwich still in his hand, and climbed into the truck to drive off towards the camp.  
  
X-Ray was the first of the boys to speak, "Haha, man, you're givin' him one good doing over. I've never seen anyone talk to him like that."  
  
"Ya sure ashamed the hell outta him," Squid approved with a smile.  
  
"Teach him a lesson, man! This little hot-headed girl baggin' all over him!" Magnet smiled.  
  
"Yeah, the hotness gave Mr. Sir quite a buuurrrnnn!" Caveman added, and around him all the boys chorused together in saying "Hey, Mr. Sir, would you like some ice for that BUUURRRNN!"  
  
"Damn straight, no one gets past The Hotness. Mess with the fire you get burned," X-Ray laughed.  
  
"The Hotness IS a burn," Armpit said, not even sure exactly what he was saying. In the distance they saw the truck again approaching, and they all quieted down as it came near and parked. Mr. Sir clomped out of the truck roughly, and muttered angrily under his breath, "Lunch, your highness." And without another word crawled back into the truck and drove away.  
  
Laney smiled widely, "Guess he couldn't stand the heat."  
  
The boys all shouted their delight at seeing Mr. Sir beaten, and then called over to Laney, "Go dig your hole, Hotness. The day ain't over yet," but all of them felt a new energy to finish out their holes. 


	3. New Campers, Old Friends

NOTE: OK, so this chapter isn't very exciting... in fact its rather boring, but exams are coming up and I'm studying and... yeah, I'll stop with the excuses, but I apologize in advance. Maybe I'll fix it later, or not, we'll see.  
  
A week had gone by since Laney, The Hotness, had arrived at camp, and things were finally starting to settle down. All the problems with The Hotness being a girl, which had erupted in discomfort the first day or two, had dwindled down to nothing. She was, for all intents and purposes, one of the guys. Almost like a sister. In fact the boys of D-Tent welcomed her openly into their clique one they had gotten over the initial awkwardness.  
  
Laney was even getting used to the digging (her hands had begun to scar over nicely) and proved to be quite quick with a shovel. Which worked out well because it gave her a lot of time to hang out in the Wreck Room.  
  
The boy enjoyed having her around simply for the change of pace she provided for the humdrum monotony they had been living before; and she never lost her slight temper, or strong-will for political correctness, which proved to be, on many occasions, an everlasting source of entertainment.  
  
Yup, things were beginning to feel normal again at Camp Green Lake - until they saw the bus. As soon as Squid saw the first puff of dust rising in the distance, he rushed inside to inform everyone that the school bus was arriving with a new camper. A buzz of chatter filled the room. Not only did they have to speculate what the new kid would be like, but now they had to wonder if it would be a boy or a girl.  
  
Many of the campers crowded onto the porch to await the new arrival, but the bus kicked up so much dust when it stopped that they could only make out a tiny figure before it was ushered roughly into Mr. Sir's office.  
  
Everyone was bouncing with assumptions. Everyone except Laney. She stayed quiet, leaning up against the wood post, waiting with a bit of dread. *If* it was a girl and they didn't get along, it would be torture. They were going to have to be together constantly, merely because they were the only girls. They would even have to share a tent, and the showers (as soon as the female showers were completed, that is).  
  
On the other hand, she thought, it would be nice to have someone to chat and gossip and PMS with if they got along. It wasn't always easy being the only girl at the camp.  
  
But being the only girl would be better than being stuck with someone you hated.  
  
She was shaken out of her thoughts by Magnet, who slung his arm easily over her shoulder, "Ready for a roomie?" He nodded towards Mr. Sir's door, where two figures had now appeared. It was evident the tall bulky one was Mr. Sir, and it was also obvious the figure with him was a female. The dust and heat clouded any more detail than that about the new arrival.  
  
Laney squinted hard, desperately trying to see her new companion. But her ears proved to be stronger than her eyes. She heard a familiar voice jabber, "So... you're kind of like... the Gordon Bombay of the camp? Cowboy Bombay..."  
  
"NO WAY!" Laney cried in disbelief, now walking towards the new girl, whose face lit up. They both started laughing instantly, and embraced in a friendly hug. Now that the dust had begun to settle, the boys looked out at the scene in puzzlement.  
  
The most distinguishing characteristic about the new girl was her height. She was short; even shorter than The Hotness. She bouncing up and down as her and Laney walked towards the boys, and they heard Laney saying to her, "You got caught, too? I thought I was the only one who they found. I told them I had been working alone, but I guess they figured it out." The girl nodded.  
  
By now they had reached the porch, and Laney changed the subject by saying, "Well, welcome to Camp Green Lake!" In the background Mr. Sir could be heard yelling about, "...can't leave the camp tour. I haven't even told ya about the damn lizards. I'm warnin' you! Git yourself back here this instant!" But no one paid him much attention.  
  
Zigzag's eyes widened as they walked up, and he looked left and right before uttering, "Two of them."  
  
Squid, quite used to it, ignored this comment, and asked through his toothpick, "Whose the gal?"  
  
The new camper finally spoke, in a loud excited voice, "Oh my stoob! Don't mind me, I'm cool as a cucumber!"  
  
Laney chuckled at this, but the boys just looked toward each other, their foreheads wrinkled with confusion.  
  
"This is Q, er... Sarah Quimby. A friend of mine, if you couldn't tell," The Hotness laughed. She was in good cheer now that her friend was here.  
  
Laney then introduced Q to all of the D-Tent boys, and had just finished going down the line when Mr. Sir stormed up and grabbed her by the shoulder, "Now listen here, missy, I have to tell ya about the damn lizards. This here ain't no gi-" he paused, "boy scouts camp." He squinted his eyes and growled deeply, "folla me."  
  
Laney saluted her friend, "I guess you better finish off your tour. See you at dinner!"  
  
Q saluted back, and a few of the boys who had been standing on the porch waved, or nodded their heads in acknowledgement. Others did nothing, but stared silently after the tiny, energetic figure as she bounded away. Squid squinted his eyes, and bit down on his toothpick.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
By dinnertime Laney was loaded with questions, and she shot them all at Q when she walked in the door.  
  
"How is Frances? And Elliott? What about KP? Is Billy doing OK? What's Tyler up to these days? Is Lindsey well? And Katie? Brock? Claire? Emma? Laura, Lauren, Rachel, Efrem, Jesse?"  
  
"Woah there slick, you've only been gone for a week!" Q replied.  
  
"Oh, I know, but I miss everyone," Laney sighed.  
  
"You might not have to miss them long," Q shrugged.  
  
"What?! Do you think the rest of them will get caught?" Laney looked around her and lowered her voice, "Do they know how many people were involved?"  
  
"I'm not sure," Q whispered back, "But they seem pretty vicious in their search. I don't bet they'll give up until they find them. But don't worry, we hid them *reeeaalll* well." Q winked.  
  
"Haha, good good. I'm glad to hear the operation is still in action. I just hope -" she stopped suddenly, realizing that half of the boys around the table were staring in their general direction curiously.  
  
Laney coughed into her hand, and quickly asked, "So, what's for dinner?!"  
  
And what was for dinner was quite a pleasant surprise, at least for The Hotness. When she approached the counter, prepared to argue with the cook yet again, he handed her a plate with a burger in the middle of it, grumbled, "Veggie burger. You better damn well like it."  
  
Laney's face broke into a smile, "Wow! Thanks!"  
  
But the cook made no reply. He just walked away mumbling something about orders, and the warden, and lawsuits, and his salary. The Hotness didn't pay him much attention, for she was too busy bounding over to the table to display her victory to they other campers.  
  
~~~  
  
NOTE: Haha, wow, it's kind of confusing to keep switching between the names "Laney" and "The Hotness". But anyway, yay Q's finally here! And this chapter was really boring!  
  
*cough* I also realize my story has quite a few holes in it (no pun intended) like the fact that Laney was there a whole week before they started feeding her vegetarian food, but yeah, I'm over it. =) 


	4. Smiles

NOTE: Thanks for the reviews, they make me happy. So happy in fact that I'm blowing off studying so I can write a little more. Hehe. And have no fear, romances will blossom in the near future, just you wait =) And yeah, I can't believe I forgot to put Twitch in the story so far! AH! That will soon be fixed  
  
**Q- I LOVE YOU and I'm going to miss you dearly. Your note like made me cry (yeah, the one that didn't show up on the website, haha). We'll communicate through fan fiction, it'll be like a secret language or something. Then again I could always just pick up the phone... but who wants to be that unoriginal? Congrats on making it through HS =D  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Ack," Q grunted as she fell backwards for the umpteenth time that day, "How the hell do I do this, bu-ddy?"  
  
All the boys of D-Tent, and the other girl of G-Tent, looked over at her with sympathy. If having to dig her first hole wasn't bad enough, the shovel towered a good few inches above Q's head, which only added to the difficulty. For all the effort she was putting into digging, she didn't show many signs of progress. In fact, every time she pressed down on the shovel *she* seemed to move more often than the dirt did.  
  
"Maybe you should just dig with your hands?" Magnet suggested.  
  
"You could pull the blade of the shovel off? Maybe it would be easier if you didn't have the long handle..." Caveman proposed, always one to offer an idea.  
  
"No!" Zigzag yelled instantly, "They're watching.. you don't want to know what they'll do if you break the shovel!"  
  
And so it was that Quimby was stuck still struggling to dig her hole when Mr. Sir drove up in the water truck. They all lined up, in the correct order, as he supplied them with (as he liked to call it) life. After all the water jugs had been filled, Mr. Sir looked critically at the dent Q had made in the ground.  
  
"Now just wut have you been up to? Not diggin' your hole I see. That ain't the way things work here at Camp Green Lake, I'm sure the warden wud be happy to hear of -" but he was cut off by Q's sobs.  
  
It was a habit of Q's that she really couldn't help. Sometimes she just had the urge to cry. Kind of like that time she lost her glasses, though they were really on her head. Or the time her glasses fell off and she broke down in front of a group of kids she didn't really know. Or when the people at Hannahfords kicked her out. Likewise, she just broke out crying now.  
  
She began to stutter out some indecipherable words in a high-pitched voice that sounded something like, "...trying...shovel...short...falling..." but she was unable to create complete sentences.  
  
Mr. Sir was completely taken aback by this display. Never before had he needed to deal with something like *this*. No body ever cried at Camp Green Lake! These were supposed to be tough juvenile delinquents.  
  
But he couldn't loose his authority now, not in front of all the campers. He just had to play it cool. Keep his head up, and keep his words stern. He took in a deep breath, prepared to tell her to quit her yapping and answer his question, but instead all that came out what, "Make it shut up! Jesus!" and then he stumbled quickly into his truck and drove away at high speed, barely remembering to watch out for holes.  
  
The boys all looked at Q, some with concern, some with confusion, and some with derision, for they weren't very used to such a presentation of emotions. The Hotness, however, was unable to stifle herself and broke out laughing.  
  
"Sorry Q, but I'm so used to it by now... and did you see Mr. Sir's face? HA!" She fell over into her hole in hysterics.  
  
Squid jumped up out of his hole, and the more sympathetic boys cringed, preparing for him to come down harshly on Q for her outburst. He was never one to enjoy a show of emotion.  
  
"Need help with your hole?" was all he asked.  
  
The other boys, and Laney, thought they must've misheard him. Or maybe it was a joke. Did Squid just offer to *help* someone else with their hole? And did he just ignore that crying fit that had just occurred? No one could believe it; it was just TOO out of character for him.  
  
Quimby, who was now returning to a normal state (the fits tended to come and go in little waves), replied, "I think I've got it under control." And to prove her point picked up her shovel and jammed it into the ground...  
  
...and fell over backwards. When she landed, she was facing the road, and she signaled towards it.  
  
"Looks like we got a new friend," X-Ray said sarcastically as he saw the bus approaching.  
  
~~~~~~~~~  
  
They all finished their holes quickly, anxious to get back to camp to see the new arrival. All except Q that is, who just dug half a hole and walked back to camp hoping no one would notice (or be too scared to ask in fear of upsetting her).  
  
They all wandered anxiously around the camp, in the showers, and through the wreck room, hoping for a glance at the new boy... or girl. By late afternoon they had decided that they had been mistaken, and that there was no new camper after all, until Pendanski finally walked in with not one, but TWO kids by his side.  
  
To his left what a short boy wearing a visor. His eyes flickered nervously around the room, and his fingers were playing constantly with the zipper on his orange jumpsuit. His mouth kept moving from a smile, to a frown, and back again, and it was evident that even though he stood there before them he would never be one to stand completely still. Without even having to think about it, the other campers unanimously dubbed the new boy Twitch.  
  
To Pendanski's right stood a girl, with a fairly indifferent look on her face. She was taller than Laney and Q, more of a normal height, with long blond hair pulled into braids. She carried a guitar slung across her shoulders, and looked idly at the kids around her, slightly nervous that she didn't see any other girls.  
  
And then she heard it from the far back corner of the wreck room, "Boo- woop!"  
  
She recognized the call, as it had become familiar to her as the password to get into their hideout. She called back, "Boo-woop!" hopefully. And Laney and Q finally appeared plowing through the tall boys.  
  
"KP!" they cried in unison, and ran up to greet her. The new girl broke out in laughter and embraced in a group hug.  
  
"So they got you too? Oh man, who's left manning the project? Is it... over?" Laney asked hesitantly.  
  
"No fear," KP, replied happily, "Emma's still on the job. She's got it under control..."  
  
"Excuse me!" Pendanski broke in, shoving The Hotness and Q away, annoyed that his tour of the camp had been broken into. He proceeded to show KP and Twitch around the grounds. KP, obviously, was placed into G-Tent, and lucky Twitch was now a member of D-Tent.  
  
By the time they were settled into camp, it was time for dinner.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Is that... I mean, does it taste..." Magnet broke off, not sure how to finish the sentence without sounding offensive. He was standing next to Laney in the dinner line, eyeing her veggie burger suspiciously.  
  
"Yeah, it's actually really good! Well, better than that crap," she signaled towards the slop the other kids were getting piled onto their plates.  
  
"I've never really liked eating animals," Magnet confessed.  
  
"Then don't!" Laney encouraged, and then called towards the cook, "Hey, how about grilling up another burger?"  
  
"How about shoving it up your - !" The cook began to reply, but cut himself off quickly, afraid he'd upset the warden if he didn't comply. He really hated that girl.  
  
Laney giggled slightly, enjoying her ability to push the cook around, "There! Now you never have to eat dead flesh again! Unless you want to of course"  
  
Magnet stuck out his tongue, "'Cause it sounds to appetizin' when you push it that way and all."  
  
She smiled in response, and murmured, "Mmm mmm!" before laughing and walking away towards the usual table. Magnet watched her as she walked away, a small smile playing on his lips.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
It was evident to the boys throughout dinner that there was something strange about KP and Laney's friendship. Not strange in an awkward or troublesome way at all, but when watching them together it was evident that the girls were just TOO MUCH a like. They didn't look alike in the least, but their mannerisms, sense of humor, and attitudes they were ridiculously close. And it was evident that they shared numerous inside jokes that no one else, save Q some of the time, understood.  
  
However, KP was not quite so obnoxiously politically correct as Laney, though she did have her moments, and in general she was probably the more outgoing of the two.  
  
"Yeah, we're usually considered to be one person," KP informed the table after Caveman had commented on their similarity.  
  
"Considered to be?" Laney scoffed, "We ARE one person."  
  
"...on the kitchen floor!" KP replied, and the three girls laughed, while the boys looked on with confusion. As with the other jokes that night, they decided to ignore it and move on.  
  
"How'd ya get Mr. Sir to lettcha keep your guitar?" Squid asked, honestly curious as normally no one was allowed to keep personal belongings with them.  
  
"Oh, I'm not really sure," KP recalled, "I guess when he tried to take it from me I said something about how special it was, and he instantly freaked out screaming, 'Now don't you cry! I've had enough of it! No more cryin'!' and he just kept yelling. I wasn't even crying or anything, I have no idea what he was talking about, he seemed pretty flustered. And in the end he just told me to keep the guitar. I have no idea what had gotten into him."  
  
All around the table eyes shot towards Q , who smiled sheepishly. KP, this time, was the one out of the loop.  
  
"So do you know how ta play?" X-Ray asked KP, but she shook her head.  
  
"Not yet, I only just got it for my birthday, but I want to learn."  
  
Zigzag, who had stayed fairly silent through dinner, picked his eyes up at this stared at KP. A moment later her eyes flicker toward him, and she offered a friendly smile. He seemed embarrassed at being caught watching her, and quickly returned his eyes to his food, trying hard to hide his smile.  
  
NOTE: and now, back to studying! 


	5. Yo dude

NOTE: Well, after a week or two of crazy graduation, parties, exams, Monkton, street shooting and whatever else it's finally SUMMER and I finally have time to write more. Yay! Thanks sooo much for all the reviews, they totally keep me going and I love you all for it!  
  
To squid is awesome (yeah he is!) - sorry if that was a little confusing, all I meant by it was that all the campers expected Squid to tease her for crying, but instead he asked if she wanted help on her hole.  
  
And did you know Holes doesn't come out on video till Sept 23! How will we ever wait that long?! Anyway, enough notes for now, on with the story!  
  
The next day they were back out in the dried up lake, digging through the clouds of dust. Laney's hands had begun to harden, and she was having no more trouble than any of the boys with her hole. Q was still trying to master the art of using a shovel which towered above her, and was still fairly unsuccessful. KP was struggling proficiently with her first hole, getting caught up on all the doings in the camp, as well as bonding with the boys. Likewise, Twitch was working hard on his hole, throwing the dirt around spastically, only stopping to examine the sores on his hands.  
  
Early midday the water truck appeared on the horizon, and the campers all scrambled out of their holes and waited in line anxiously.  
  
"You surviving your first day?" X-Ray asked, directed at both KP and Twitch.  
  
The two new campers nodded, and KP replied, "Yeah, managing. If I was awake enough to notice the pain it would be worse."  
  
"Early mornings, less sun," Squid informed her, and she nodded in agreement.  
  
Twitch was not saying much of anything, as his eyes slid along the road, watching the water truck's movements. It is not possible to say if this was because he was terribly thirsty (being his first day he had not rationed off his water well), or if he was mesmerized by the truck itself, and the tingling in his fingers that wanted to drive.  
  
"Ugh, it's wicked hot today though," Laney remarked.  
  
"Ain't it always?" Armpit shot back.  
  
Laney laughed, "I suppose. I think my hair like... soaks up the sun cause it's so dark," she ruffled the sweaty spikes in the back of her head as if to rub out the heat.  
  
"Here, it'll block out some sun," Magnet plucked his bandana off his own head and tossed it towards her.  
  
Laney caught it and shook her head, "No way! I'm not taking your bandana! I'm the idiot who didn't think to bring anything for myself from home."  
  
"I got tons back at camp," Magnet shrugged.  
  
"But your head's going to burn today!"  
  
"*Your* head's going to burn," He chuckled, reaching up to rub his nose and smudging a smear of dirt across his cheek, "I'll be offended if you don't wear it."  
  
"Damn you," Laney said with a grin, and tied the bandana onto her head gratefully and skillfully, for she wore bandanas all the time back at home, "Thanks."  
  
By this time the water truck had reached the crew and pulled up beside them. They all stopped talking in order to listen to Mr. Sir's pointless babbling as he filled the canteens.  
  
"Yessir, those lizards go crazy jus' about this time a' year. It's cause a' the..." he paused for a moment as his eyes flickered towards Quimby's holes, which was about half as deep as the others. He looked back towards the kids and cleared his throat, "cause a' the winds. You best watch 'rselves, wouldn't want ta be bit! Haha. Ha," he cleaned the smile from his face, "Back to work, you lazy little terds."  
  
He missed calling them girl scouts, but he figured that "terds" would have to do for the day. With his task complete, he drove back to camp.  
  
"KP." "What?" she responded, looking around to see who had spoken her name. Zigzag sauntered up and sat down on the ground beside her.  
  
"So umm...you've got your guitar with you?" he started casually.  
  
"Yup, I've wanted one forever. I got it just before being sent here," she replied.  
  
"Yeah, well... I know how to play a little if you'd like me to teach you sometime or something. I mean, if you're interested in have a instructor. If you'd rather just teach yourself of something that's fine too-" Zigzag babbled a bit, nervous about making the proposition.  
  
But KP's eyes lit up with excitement, and she replied enthusiastically, "Really? Oh! I'd love to learn to play. You're sure you wouldn't mind?"  
  
Zigzag seemed to relax once he had heard her response, "Yeah! Yeah. Umm... I'll find you after diggin'. Don't let the lizards bite!" He stood up and bounded back over to his hole, back to digging.  
  
KP took a swig of water from her canteen, and looked around to find Laney. She *had* to tell her about this! She knew Laney would share in the excitement with her, but as it was The Hotness was already fast at work on her hole again, and so KP decided she'd have to wait to spread the news. She picked up her shovel and stole a quick glance at Zigzag before continuing to dig away as fast as she could.  
  
********  
  
Back at camp, while the other campers were hanging out in the wreck room, KP and Zigzag sat together during her first lesson, trying to ignore the noise from inside. Actually, the noise from inside was mostly noise from Q at the moment.  
  
By a stroke of luck she had been fooling with the dials and antenna of the TV (free to do as she liked with it now that Zigzag was preoccupied) and had happened to come across none other than The Mighty Ducks movie. Though the picture was fuzzy, and the audio barely perceptible at all through the crackling, Q was able to recite along with the entire scene (which just so happened to be the Jesse Hall speech). Everyone else in the room had stopped their games to stare at her with dropped jaws, all except The Hotness, who mouthed the words along with her silently.  
  
When the scene had finished, X-Ray shook his head, and said nothing more than, "Woah."  
  
Laney just snorted and remarked, "THAT was nothing. You should see this girl obsess, she has skill."  
  
"I'm even better at stalking!" Q agreed.  
  
The boys exchanged glances, not exactly sure what to say about that.  
  
"That's what got us here in the first place, huh? Ha, those poor kids. You wouldn't believe it. This kid in my class named Connor, he was a prime target. She scared him to death, well, not that he wasn't already near dead anyway, what with being sick all the time."  
  
Q squealed at the mention of the boy Connor, but everyone else in the room was perplexed. In an attempt to break the awkward silence that followed, Caveman said, "Well, that's uhh... I mean, it's really..." but he couldn't think of an adjective to use.  
  
"Sketch," Squid filled in for him.  
  
"Bob Dole says it is!" Q replied.  
  
Again the boys were baffled, but this time Squid laughed warmly, before looking at his watch, "Bob Dole is my idol. Time for dinner, Sketch." And he and Q walked out of the room together, followed quickly by the rest of the gang, and lastly by KP and Zigzag, who stopped by the tent to dispose the guitar.  
  
NOTE: Blah, romances or whatever. Heh. This chapter was a bit short and probably not as funny to people who don't actually know Q ;).  
  
So I actually have no idea where I'm going with this story. It kind of makes itself up as I go, but as long as people keep reading I'll keep writing, I suppose =). 


	6. Competition

NOTE: I would just like to say, for those who would understand the importance (i.e. Q, at this point, the rest of you will get it later!) I was listening to no other than the Half-Steps as I wrote this chapter :D  
  
Thanks for all the reviews guys!!! You all are the best, and why I keep writing! And Laura for her whole slew of reviews =) and Rain for being a Mighty Ducks fan! Haha, Jesse is like the best character! Or was I guess... tis a shame he disappeared, hmmm.  
  
Moving on...  
  
Dinner, at the moment, was a chaotic bedlam. Q has slipped into another one of her crying fits, this time triggered by her glasses which had slipped quickly off her nose and landed *splat* in the messy green slop of food on her plate.  
  
As she sobbed, random words could be heard hiccupping out of her mouth, "...now I... can't see... gross... why did... everyone thinks..."  
  
Laney and KP exchanged glances, and smiled slightly at each other. It was just another aspect of Q they had come to know and love. The boys on the other hand were just as taken aback as they had been the day before at her hole, all staring down the table silently. All except Squid who leapt promptly into action.  
  
As he was sitting across from her, he merely needed to reach out and pluck the glasses out of the goop. He dunked them briskly in his glass of water, and swished them around until almost all the particles of green had vanished and sunk to the bottom of his glass. He pulled them out, dried them slightly on his orange jumpsuit, and placed them down in front of her.  
  
She looked up, "*sniff*... thanks..." she choked out, putting the glasses back on her face, and whipping her face dry.  
  
"Anytime, Sketch," he offered casually and continued with his eating. All the boys slowly followed Squid's lead, and turned back to their food.  
  
"You are one crrrazy spaz," Armpit told Q, shaking his head.  
  
"Spaz! That's was spaz! This is spaz!" Q told him, before falling into a state of random twitching. She arms and legs spasmed around her, and she accidentally smacked Magnet in the face, but even that didn't stop her. Her face, too, contorted with twinges of the eyes and mouth, which were shut very tight. It was by pure luck that she managed not to fall off of her seat.  
  
Finally, she began to settle down, and her body stilled itself.  
  
"Man, you're almost as good as Twitch there," X-Ray commented, nodding towards the anxious boy.  
  
"ALMOST as good?" Magnet countered, "She's like, the twitch master!"  
  
"Nah, no one could be twitchier than Twitch," Caveman disagreed.  
  
"You wanna bet on that?" Squid entered the conversation, "I bet shecould totally out twitch him."  
  
"Naw man, I've gotta be true to my boys. Twitch is still the master," Armpit interjected.  
  
Zigzag shook his head, "There's only one way to solve this," he said, eyes open wide with excitement, "A twitching contest. Tomorrow night after digging. Wreck room."  
  
Everyone agreed that this was a fair solution, except for Twitch who was rather nervous about being the center of attention the next day. But then again, when isn't Twitch nervous? And so the competition was on.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The next day buzzed with excitement. Every camper had strong opinions on who would whose ass in the competition, and they began placing bets with their shower tokens (all except Armpit, who people refused to take shower tokens from).  
  
Digging went surprisingly fast, as everyone was looking forward to the events of the evening, and not thinking about the pain in their hands and backs. Once they had finished their own holes, the campers walked over to Q and Twitch, threw them aside so as to save their energy, and all worked collectively to finish their holes as well.  
  
The kids who finished their showers first rushed to the Wreck Room to help set up an area for the competition. They pulled all the chairs, and any other objects that could be used as a seat, around the edges of the room, and pushed the pool table, tv, and other items off to the sides to provide a nice wide twitching arena.  
  
By the time Q and Twitch arrived (they came later than most, because they had been gifted with extra long showers thanks to the other boys and gals of the camp, who wanted them to be in top position) every seat was filled, and the room was bubbling with noise, which slowly quieted to an anxious murmur as Sketch and Twitch made their way into the center of the room.  
  
X- Ray stood up, and introduced the competition, and competitors, to the other campers as if they didn't already know. Everyone was sitting high on the edges of their chairs when X-Ray finally said, "Ready... Set... TWITCH!"  
  
And after only a moment's hesitation, they were off! At first it was impossible to even see the limbs or faces of the two contestants as they were vibrating so quickly with their twitching. They were no more than blurs of color whipping across the floor jaggedly. Once the first 15 minutes or so had passed both contestants slowed down to a more steady pace, and those still spastic and quick, it was possible for the audience to now see the twitching action clearly and the determination in both of the scrunched up faces.  
  
Q's glasses had long since fallen off, and Squid lunged forward and grabbed them away from the danger of the floor. The room was a ruckus of cheers, catcalls, chants, laughter, and awe.  
  
"Sketch is creepy, short and fast, Watch her kick some twitching ass!"  
  
"Twitch! Twitch! It's in the name, you little boy, you got game!"  
  
"Hey hey! Ho ho! Sketch's twitch has got the flow!"  
  
"1, 2, 3, 4, Twitch is our mad twitching whore!"  
  
"Ow OW! Look at that girl go!" Magnet catcalled to Quimby.  
  
So the cheers were lame, REALLY lame, but everyone was way too into the match to worry much about how stupid they looked. (Besides, they were better than CVU's cheers, as was shown at the Rebels hockey game. *cough*). Laney and KP were sitting together on a couch, talking quietly to each other, but obviously very amused that Sketch's twitching talent, that she had always possessed, was finally coming in handy. They contributed to the yelling with random outbursts of odd words such as "Onibla! Onibla!!" and "Sinep, Q... Stoob!" but no one thought to question them on their weird vocabulary.  
  
Once an hour had passed, the twitching has slowed considerably. Q and Twitch were both laying on the floor curled up, each twitching some part of their body atleast once every 10 seconds or so. And then they both fell still, exhausted, and the hubbub from the crowd died down into a few hushed whispers as everyone leaned forward, many people holding their breaths.  
  
Was that it? Were they both done? Was it going to be a tie? No one was sure, and people began to look to X-Ray to guide them on what to do next. But then it happened. The whole crowd witnessed, though some only out of the corners of their eyes, Q's toe, with one last great effort, pitch forward in a move of glory, before collapsing back into place.  
  
"IT'S OVER!" X-Ray mediated, "SKETCH IS THE WINNER! By the toe of her boot!"  
  
"Can you believe it?!" Laney looked excitedly towards KP, "Q won by her stoob! She'll be so excited."  
  
"Whenever we can tell her, which will be when she regains consciousness I suppose..." KP looked slightly worriedly at the center of the room, where Magnet, Squid, Zigzag and Caveman were now helping the slumping Q and Twitch to their feet. Throughout the room people could be heard exchanging shower tokens, half of the campers glowing in victory, and the other half grumbling at defeat. But even their grumbling was not in bad temper, for everyone was still too energized and thrilled from the excitement of the event, and they all left for dinner in good spirits.  
  
The last to leave were obviously Q and Twitch, being half dragged along by the four boys who stayed to support them. And of course Laney and KP stayed too, to congratulate their friends on their high-quality twitching.  
  
Q looked up, looked around a bit confused, and then murmured, "Just tell Sam... tell Sam... I'm his number one stalker."  
  
KP and Laney looked at her knowingly and said a solemn, "Amen." But Squid's face glowered at this as he watched them.  
  
Twitch, too, began to reanimate, "What? What?? Where's the car? I can do it. oooh, yeah, just let me behind that wheel. Oooh baby, vroom vroom. That's the ticket!"  
  
No one bothered to inform Twitch that he was not inside a car. They figured he was happier that way.  
  
Dinner was all just talk of the competition. Everyone was recapping the action, and embellishing the stories (as if the other campers hadn't been watching anyway!). The stories had been so glorified that within half an hour Sketch and Twitch were Camp Green Lake legends for always and eternity.  
  
Dinner seemed to be good for Sketch and Twitch, too, who began to recover from their exhausting feat. As they gulped down the food and they water, their eyes slowly lit up, and they became more active and talkative. Both received constant hand shakes, pats on the back, compliments, and smiles.  
  
When dinner had ended everyone filed out of the mess hall, still in a glow of excited chatter. Quimby, who had eaten and drunk more than the rest of the table after all her exercise of the day, rushed to bring her plate up, and ended up being the last to leave.  
  
When she exited the building she found Squid standing just outside the door, leaning on the frame.  
  
"Good job today," he congratulated her, "You're quite the twitcher."  
  
"Oh yes," she replied, though she had blushed slightly, "It's a talent I've always possessed. Twitching comes in handy all the time you know. That's how you dance to techno music! Or how I do at least, I don't know what normal people do. Techno music... you know what that makes me think of? The Mighty Ducks. You see, there was tecno music in this one movie that an actor was with an actor who was in another movie whose sister was in a band that had a bass player who went to the same high school as a boy who was in a movie with Dean Portman!" She said it all proudly, and paused to take a breath, but Squid stopped her before she could go on.  
  
Without saying a word, he leaned over and lightly kissed Q on the cheek. Q's eyes grew wide, and her cheeks blushed brightly. It seemed to Squid that her eye even did a slight twitch.  
  
"Well..." was all her said, before smiling and turning to saunter back to D tent, whistling as he did so.  
  
Q could do nothing more than stand in fascination. For some girls, a kiss of the cheek might have meant nothing, but for Q it was a BIG DEAL. I mean, the girl had never even held hands romantically before! What. Just. Happened. OhmystoobIjustgotkissedbyahotlikeMacaluayCulkinboy, her mind was racing.  
  
All of a sudden she squealed in a piercingly high voice, and, impatient to tell Laney and KP the news, she ran off towards G tent, her arms and legs flailing out to all sides. 


	7. Cult

NOTE: For those of you who aren't aware, the flamer isn't actually Goldy (she's a good pal of mine). And no, they're not actually reading the story or anything, they're doing it to a lot of people under poor Goldy's name. Haha, just thought I'd clear up any confusion. If we have any Buffy fans here, you should def check out Goldy!  
  
So I had lots of issues with this chapter. It was WAY too fluffy for me at first, so I tried to revise it. Now it's just way too fluffy, much too long, and disgustingly random. So, let it be warned that I really don't like this chapter. All the same I was feeling way to lazy to redo it all together, so you're stuck with it =P.  
  
As always, thank you SO MUCH to all my reviewers. You have my love and appreciation forever! MUAH! You totally keep my going - keep the inspiration flowing!  
  
************  
  
At breakfast the next day, Q and Squid didn't speak directly to each other, but they did make a point of sitting next together at the table. Q began a habit of blushing whenever Squid caught her staring over at him, which was fairly often. Laney and KP, who had of course heard about the cheek kiss in excruciating detail the night before, kept looking over at the two and whispering.  
  
Actually, Laney and KP hardly had the need to whisper, for most of they time they simply could use ESPN. Now, you may think I mean ESP, but ESPN is definitely the term. Though the two are quite similar, ESPN is special to just Laney and KP. ("But I have ESPN." Says Brock. "No you don't" - KP. *Brock looks confused*. Anyway...)  
  
Breakfast was soon over, and they were off again, trudging out to the digging site. Though Mr.Sir indicated precisely where they should dig, Q and Squid worked their way around until their holes were next to one another.  
  
KP had ended up next to Zigzag, and decided to start up a chat, "Aw, they're pretty cute, don't you think?" she said, nodding her head in Q and Squid's direction.  
  
"Umm... cute like, a kitten? Or cute like... sexy? Or cute like... the way Mr. Sir looks after shooting the head off of a particularly nasty lizard? Or..."  
  
KP cut him off with a confused expression, "Uhh... though Mr. Sir IS pretty cute, I was kinda thinking more along the lines of cute like a couple."  
  
"Oh," Zigzag replied, looking curiously over at them, "They're not, are they? I mean, Squid's not really the lovey type, ya know?"  
  
KP shook her head, "Oh goodness, boys are so oblivious sometimes," she said under her breath, but just loud enough so that Zigzag could inconspicuously hear. Then she continued in a normal volume, "I guess that's why he kissed her last night, huh?"  
  
Zigzag's eyes opened wide, and his hair stuck wildly on end at this thought. But the conversation had to end there, for they could waste no more breath on talking when they needed all the energy they had for digging.  
  
**********  
  
When the puff of dust appeared in the distance to warn the diggers of the upcoming water break, they all jumped happily out of their holes. As KP and Magnet passed Laney's hole, they noticed that it stuck in oddly on one side. They cleared their throats to get her attention.  
  
"Umm... nice technique, honey," KP mocked.  
  
"Hey, I thought it would be fun to dig a tunnel! Wouldn't it be funny if just all of a sudden I popped out of the side of yours or something. If we connect all the tunnels it'll be like a big fun maze!" Laney explained.  
  
Magnet raised his eyebrows, "I think it's against the rules to enjoy digging that much."  
  
"Hey, as long as I dig the same amount of dirt it shouldn't hurt my character building, right?" she shrugged, "It's not as if they check at the end of the day."  
  
KP and Magnet looked over at each other and exchanged glances that proclaimed, affectionately, that Laney had obviously gone mad.  
  
They hoisted her up out of her hole, and listened with amusement as she told them about how cool she thought a whole underground system of holes would be, with rooms and hallways and passages. "Like a hotel!" she exclaimed.  
  
*********  
  
It was quite a bit later that day when they finally heard the inevitable *thump* of dirt on dirt. As each digger exited their hole and observed the scene, it became clear that Laney's tunneling idea hadn't been quite as brilliant as she had thought. The entire roof of her tunnel had caved in on top of her, leaving a scarring ditch across the ground.  
  
No one was quite sure what to do, until they saw a lump of dirt that slowly lifted backward and revealed itself to be none other than Laney's head. Everyone let out a sigh of relief, and she spit out a few mouthfuls of dust before stating, "It caved in."  
  
Now that any worry was gone, the campers of D and G tents felt free to laugh at Laney, in all her glorious stupidity and dirt. Squid took off his hat and chucked it at her head playfully, with good aim. It took them a few minutes to calm down enough to listen to what she was saying.  
  
"Umm... guys, I hate to interrupt, but I can't move. I'm totally stuck," she said simply. This of course brought another storm of laughter from the crowd.  
  
Once they had dried the tears from their eyes, a few of them set to work digging her out, as the rest returned to their holes, giggling every time they looked back at the scene.  
  
Once she had been freed, everyone looked over at her and tried to suppress their laughter. Her entire jumpsuit was, of course, covered in dirt. Her face too was stained with brown, that clung glompishly to her eyelashes, and eyebrows. Her hair was the best. It was drenched in dirt, like the rest of her, and the bandana she had borrowed from Magnet had slipped sideways. This caused the majority of her hair to be clumped over on the right side of her head, with a small flip above her forehead, much like a porn star.  
  
"I LOOK LIKE HARRY POTTER!" she declared over the boys' laughter, "Well I think that's enough digging for today. Back to camp for me. If Mr. Sir asks, umm... tell him I was advocating the liberation of the poor overworked farm mules or something. That should confuse him well enough."  
  
"Dude, here," X-Ray said, struggling to keep his composure. He held out his hand and produced a shower token, "You need this a bit more than I do today."  
  
"Haha, yeah, take it," Magnet said, producing a shower token from his pocket and handing it to her too.  
  
"You guys, I'm NOT taking your-" Laney started, but X-Ray cut her off.  
  
"We're not doing it for you! I think I'd die laughing if I had to look at you looking like that all night."  
  
"Ha Ha Ha," Laney mocked, but she was smiling when she grabbed the tokens out of their hands. She turned to leave and tried to readjust her hair, but only ended up making it worse, and the hoots of amusement followed her as she walked back to camp.  
  
*********  
  
Laney wandered into the Wreck Room after her nice long shower (meaning about twelve minutes - for Camp Green Lake, that was luxury). Only X-Ray and Magnet were there, as they had been the only two to not take showers that day. At the moment they were in a heated game of pool, and hadn't noticed her enter.  
  
"Thanks Guys, that feels sooo much better!" she called out to them.  
  
Magnet began to walk toward her, speaking slowly and enunciating every word, "You... are... an... IDIOT!" and as he reached her he smacked her playfully on the back of her wet head.  
  
"Hey, admit it, it *would* have been cool if it had worked," she persisted.  
  
"It would have been *lame*, had it not collapsed all over your head, but as it is... oh wait," Magnet corrected himself, "That was pretty lame too."  
  
"pphhsssttt," Laney nudged him with her elbow, "You're just jealous that you didn't have such a fabulous idea."  
  
"Mmm, it's always been my dream to have tons of dirt crashing in on top of me," he tried to muster as serious a tone as he could handle.  
  
By this time they had made their way back to the pool table, and Laney directed her question at X-Ray, "Hey, you think it would have been pretty cool to have a whole tunnel system, right X?" she laughed at the bewildered expression on his face.  
  
"Uhh..." he stumbled, "Errr... hey Hotness, you ever play pool before?" he skillfully changed the subject.  
  
She let it go, "Yeah, once. At like, 4 a.m. at a party with an overly tired kid who was more interested in trying to draw a moustache on himself with the chalk than actually playing. He still kicked my ass though."  
  
"Here, why don't ya try some real pool?" he handed her a stick. She looked at it uncertainly.  
  
"Come 'ere. I'll show ya how to play." Magnet called her over to his side of the table. "You put one hand out here like this," he showed her how to place her hand, "which will be the guide for your stick, so you can aim. And the other goes here on the stick, which you'll push with."  
  
She fumbled around with her fingers for a moment, until he finally came up behind her and placed an arm to each side of her. He placed his own limbs on top of hers and forced her into the right positions. He moved her arms along with his as he drew the stick back, and made the shot. Nothing went into a hole, but they did manage to hit a few of the surrounding balls.  
  
"Not bad for a starter," X-Ray encouraged.  
  
"Oooh yeah, I'm a real pro. Did it all myself too," Laney teased.  
  
"Soon you'll be undefeatable, man," Magnet said, while slowly pulling his arms away from hers. He reached around to her side, and moved his arm in for the tickle.  
  
She squealed and jumped backwards, "You know, Magnet," she kidded, "You're looking a bit dirty today. Did you not take a shower or something?"  
  
He scoffed at her, "Oh man, we got a funny one here."  
  
She smiled at him innocently, and he held up his fist, as if warning her, were it not for the smile on his face.  
  
But no threat was ever carried through, as a voice spoke from the doorway, "Don't you hurt my Sunflower!"  
  
Laney looked up happily and shouted, "Frances!"  
  
********  
  
KP and Zigzag had not returned to camp after cleaning themselves up, but rather wandered to a deserted side building to continue with the guitar lessons.  
  
"Is it like this?" KP asked, strumming her fingers across the strings which let out an uncoordinated crash of noise.  
  
"Umm..." Zigzag had to keep himself from cringing, "Not exactly. You have to put your fingers right... here. Try that, hold your fingers in these places."  
  
As Zigzag pulled away, and KP reached her hand forward, their fingers briefly brushed past one another. Zigzag blushed slightly, but KP didn't seem to notice. Or rather, she was looking so intently at the guitar it was impossible to see her face for any reaction.  
  
She ran her fingers along the strings again, and this time a nice even sound was emitted.  
  
"Oh!" she chirped delightedly, "That was pretty!"  
  
"Yes it was - pretty," but he was absently looking more at the top of her head than at her fingers as he spoke. She looked up at him and broke him from his slight daze, "Yeah, yeah, that was much better. That was a uh... a C chord."  
  
"Haha, I actually played a chord?" KP mused, "Must be cause I have such a good teacher." She nudged Zigzag, who was sitting across from her, lightly with her foot.  
  
"Or cause I've got such a good student," he smiled.  
  
**********  
  
It was much later that night when the four girls were in their room, all sitting together in a circle. Frances had been happily welcomed into the crowd, though she did bring along a bit of worry for the other girls that the project was falling apart at the seams. After all, four of them had now been caught.  
  
X-Ray, feeling a bit bored and rebellious, convinced Squid to go on an expedition with him to the forbidden girls tent. The two of them had sauntered casually out of D-Tent under the pretense of needing the bathroom.  
  
But when they opened the tent flap, it was evident the girls were in the middle of some odd ritual. They had their eyes closed, and their hands resting folded in their laps.  
  
They were singing what seemed to be the tune of "In the Jungle" but the words were changed. "In Vermont, little Essex, the half steps sing tonight! Joel and Billy, Sam and Drew, will never leave our sight! Weeeeeeee love them yes we do. Oh weeeeee will always be true."  
  
In the middle of their circle was a sheet of paper. The boys had about half a minute to examine the scene before the girls noticed them. The paper had a picture at the top of four boys, and a smaller picture under it that looked like a whole group of people. There was red and black writing all over the page, and X-Ray was able to make out the words "The Half ..." in bright read writing across the top of the page before they were noticed, and the girls folded the paper up.  
  
"They interrupted out bible session!" Q exclaimed.  
  
"It's OK, guys, we'll finish it later. Our gods will forgive us," KP comforted.  
  
"Uhh... sorry, didn't mean to interrupt anything," X-Ray spoke, still a bit confused. Squid didn't say anything, but just ground his teeth on the toothpick he was biting. He didn't think he particularly liked the idea of Sketch chanting another boys name. FOUR other boys names.  
  
"No worries, nothing we can't tackle later. What's up?" Laney asked.  
  
"Nothing at all, just wanted to go for a walk. We'll be headin' back to our tent now. Cattcha bright and early."  
  
Squid tilted his head, "Night." And then the two boys walked out of the tent.  
  
As soon as they had passed hearing distance of the girls, the two boys looked at each other.  
  
"What the hell was that?" X-ray wondered.  
  
"Think I know, man? I don't know about those girls," he shook his head.  
  
"Do you think its what they were sent here for? Maybe it's a cult?"  
  
"Maybe they made people drink cool-aid and die," Squid offered.  
  
X-Ray shot him an amused look, "Dude, now you're starting to sound like Ziggy."  
  
**********  
  
NOTE: OK, so I know the last section of this was probably wicked confusing for those of you not in on the little inside joke, but it should be cleared up in the next chapter. Albeit, you probably won't really understand it even then, but you can just laugh at the weirdness, right? Heh. And thankfully that chapter is OVER! Huzzah! 


	8. Barbershop

NOTE: Wow, so I've been on vacation so it's taken awhile to update, and I haven't been able to keep up with reading and review others stories and such, but I swear I'll catch up at some point.  
  
Now for the fun news. This is the special INTERACTIVE chapter. Yes, you heard me right, interactive. Not only are there words in this chapter, but if you merely enter a few web addresses you will actually see PICTURES for your viewing pleasure. Like a movie, but much lamer. Haha, Just to add a taste of entertainment and interestingness to the story. Also, it's the only way to give at least a tiny idea of the Half Steps to those of you from outside VT. I hope this enhances your reading experience - and much thanks to KP and the Half Steps for inspiration.  
  
OH! All the links have htt p: // hometown. aol. com /staringatmyshoe/ at the very beginning of them, before the html part, just without all the spaces in the words. Sorry! That's a bit annoying and confusing, I know, but that's the only way ff.n will let me have it. So to recap, you put in that bit up there (without and spaces) and then add the html codes found in the story to the end of it and you can see the pics! Ah, I apologize for the confusingness. If you cant figure it out, but desperately want to see the pics, email me and I can send you the real addresses in full. Anyway, enjoy either way!  
  
~  
  
"Seeing as there are only four girls here, G-Tent will be joining D-Tent in group until further notice," Pendanski informed the group. This came as a surprise to no one seeing as they were already in the room together. They looked around comfortably in their lazy circle.  
  
"First Off, I'd like to ask the girls how they're doing with their digging?" Mr. Pendanski aimed the question at them.  
  
Frances, who had only just finished her first hole earlier that day, moaned with exhaustion, which kept her from being her normally cheery, chatty self. She wished she were back in Canada with all the little kinds in the freezing water at disgustingly early hours in the morning.  
  
Laney and KP, who were of course sitting next to each other, simply shrugged, "Well, at first it was a bit difficult to get our bodies back into shape for digging..." Laney began.  
  
"But now that we're back into it, it feels pretty natural," KP completed.  
  
Mr. Pendanski raised his eyebrows curiously, so Laney clarified, "Oh yeah, back in the day we helped reroute this river to an ocean. Had to dam up the whole thing, and dig trenches and stuff. Good for the land, and saved the homes of a whole slew of bird species."  
  
"Of course it was a bit different cause we were working more *in* the water that without it..." KP continued  
  
"But it still gave us the general feel for it," Laney finished. Laney and KP looked over at each other, lost in the memory of their environmental day. (To see a picture of this life enriching experience, take a trip to digitwater.html. By the way, I added and extra "m" on the word dam accidentally, but I'm too lazy to fix it. Hooray for typoes!)  
  
Mr. Pendanski scowled noticeably, wondering briefly if this former interference was getting in the way of their character building.  
  
But Q tried to reassure him, "Oh, but I still can't dig. If the stupid shovels weren't as tall as, say, Charlie Conway on top of Adam Banks, and I wasn't as small as Peter Mark on his knees, then *maybe* the stupid hole could get dug, but as it is..." she trailed off.  
  
Not surprisingly, this rant did not make Pendanski feel much better, but rather made him stare for just a moment with his jaw slightly open, before clearing his throat and turning back to the rest of group. "erm...eh... well, glad to hear it. So let's see where we left off last week. Zero, ready to talk to me yet?" but Zero just looked at him coolly and kept his mouth shut. "Too stupid for a single word I suppose." Stanley seemed like he was about to make a comment to this, but Magnet held him back. "Well, have the rest of you boys been thinking about your crimes and the error of your past ways?"  
  
They all nodded of shrugged, and Laney whispered out of the side of her mouth to Magnet, who had to suppress his snickers, "Dude, he sounds like a priest."  
  
"We haven't discussed any of the girls and their crimes yet," Pendanski began, but The Hotness interrupted him.  
  
"Crime," she said, "no S." When he again looked at her confused, she explained, "Well, we're all in here for the same thing aren't we?" and all the other girls nodded their agreement.  
  
"Well, why don't you tell us about that?" Pendanski prodded.  
  
"OK, well..."  
  
******CUE FLASHBACK******  
  
Q, Frances, KP, Laney, and many others who will not be named at the moment for confidentiality purposes (after all, they haven't been caught yet) were all from a quaint little town called South Burlington, Vermont. Quaint being a euphemism for the fact that there was *nothing* to do, so the group had to make its own fun. Namely, their fun came from last-minute DDR parties, and Q's obsessions. Her obsessions varied constantly from Mighty Ducks, to Harry Potter, to Macaulay Culkin, to Newsies, to Bob Dole, to Nightmare before Xmas, to Holes (ha!), to Connor, etc. etc. etc. (If you're more of a visual learner, you can view Q's obsessions at obsessions.html )  
  
The particular day in question started out no more special than other day. In fact, it started off rather dull, and monotonous - with a biology lab.  
  
Laney and someone who shall not be named (for secrecy) were lab partners, and for this lab had to research VT's land use history. Now THAT sounds interesting. But the someone had the bright idea to go to the school library to get books to help with the task, as it was walking distance from Laney's house.  
  
Once they were there they found not only books to enlighten them to the memoirs of Vermont dirt, but they also ran into Q, who was scanning fanfiction.net (go figure =) ) She offered them a ride home, which they accepted gratefully, and the three set off to the parking lot, not knowing what fate had in store for them on the way to the car.  
  
They first saw the four boys milling about behind the school, in the parking lot. They were dressed up in nice suits, but other than that had no particular qualities. Laney looked at them quizzically for a moment, trying to figure out why on earth they looked so familiar.  
  
"Oh my gosh!" She suddenly realized, running up to them, "I've seen you guys perform before. You're amazing!"  
  
They flashed her with their gorgeous, and yet distinctly dorky smiles, "Thanks"  
  
"Will you sing a song for us?" she inquired farther.  
  
"Well, we are warming up anyway," the boy with the longish, flipping, poofy hair thought aloud. (To see this particular boy, simply go to billy.html ).  
  
"Yeah, sure," a boy with short hair and rosy cheeks agreed, "have any particular favorites?" (If you wish to view (a kind of awkward) picture of this boy, go to sam.html ).  
  
Laney shook her head no, "Anything."  
  
They boys huddled together for a moment in consultation, and finally seemed to come to a conclusion.  
  
"You just want this one cause you get to sing lead most of it," the boy with the nice wide smile (Who can be observed at drew.html ) aimed at the poofy haired boy.  
  
"I wouldn't be complaining; basses almost never get the lead," the boy with the darkest hair, and facial hair, spoke back. (He can be visited at joel.html).  
  
They all laughed lightly, and walked into proper formation. The flippy haired boy started to sing "In the Jungle" in a stunning falsetto, as the other three boys made animal sounds around him, before proceeding into their chords.  
  
The three girls died. Well, almost.  
  
It was the most beautiful sound they had ever heard. The voiced intertwined and mixed to produce the perfect blend, a noise which was more than pleasing to the ear. It was heaven. And if the voices weren't enough, the boys had a whole skit to go along with it, but it bouncing up and down, jumping around, acting like animals, or pretending to punch each other. The overall effect was too much to handle - amazing.  
  
A barbershop quartet.  
  
Unknown to them, the four boys had just brought about their own ill fortune. And Q, to her over-energetic, stalkerish delight, had just found her newest obsession.  
  
As the song came to an end, the boys informed them, "Oh yeah, by the way, we're the Half Steps." (If you would like to see the Half Steps in all their glory, go to hsgroup.html though it is to be warned that pictures could never do them justice as their voices, as well as "dances", are completely endearing, and completely impossible to get from a picture ;).  
  
The girls released all of their biology notes, land use books, and other notebooks and allowed them to flutter to the ground as they erupted in applause, a small glint noticeable in Q's eyes behind the glasses.  
  
And that was how it all began. From there on in it was a series of concerts (it is to be noted that the Half Steps and a quartet of local High School boys, and therefore never had concerts very far from their home, making them quite accessible), photo taking, and autograph signing. Q's favorite autograph would always be the first she received, written on the flyer which was the first Half Steps flyer she had ever stolen. The flyer "The Half Steps" boldly on top, and underneath was a swirly picture of the four boys, as well as four signatures, and notes from both Sam and Joel which told Q she was their truest, and #1 stalker. They didn't realize how true the words were.  
  
They learned fairly quickly the names, and parts, of each member. The flippy haired boy was Billy, the tenor. The short haired boy with rosy cheek was Sam, the baritone. Drew was the boy with the wide smile, and he filled the part of the lead. And last, the dark haired boy was Joel, the bass.  
  
But one fateful day, it all had to come to an end. The Half Steps announced that their next concert would be their last, as college was looming up ahead for them in the fall. Q was not one to take this news lightly. After all, the Half Steps were her one obsession that she actually new in real life! Well, that and Connor, but let's not torture the poor boy more by discussing that one. I'm sure he's had enough to deal with, what with all the sickness.  
  
She called all her friends over to her house under the pretense of a movie marathon, but she had something much more devious in mind. OK, so it wasn't really her house, it was actually Katie's house, but as she lived there it seemed to be a good place for the meeting.  
  
When people showed up with their favorite movies in hand, Q quickly tossed the movies away, and informed them that, "We have a much bigger issue on hand," before revealing before them the plot in its entirety.  
  
You might think that it would be difficult to convince people to take part in a underhanded, criminal act, but when you take into consideration the "quaintness" (*cough* dullness, monotony, tedium *cough*) of Vermont, it's really no surprise that people jumped on the idea of something exciting and rebellious as soon as it jumped into their laps.  
  
When the night of the final concert arrived, Q, Laney, KP, Frances, and the rest of their crew arrived at Essex High School auditorium, fully prepared. They happily watched the first half of the performance, and then snuck out of the theater. They found the back entrance which led to the side stage.  
  
They took the pints of ice cream out of their bags, as well as they ice cream cones, and began to scoop. They placed the ice cream cones on the floor about 3 feet apart from each other on the floor, leaving a line trailing out the stage door, through the back hallway, through the outside door, and into the back of their truck.  
  
They finished just in time to hear the Half Steps concluding "Coney Island", which they repeated the end of numerous times to the audience's delight. All the South Burlington kids hid quietly inside the folds of the curtain, and inside the truck, holding their breaths waiting. It was up to the Half Steps to make the next move now.  
  
"You guys! Ice cream!!" Sam called out as he walked off stage, bending down to pick it up, and spotting the one father off, "and more!"  
  
"What? Ice cream! Hey, don't hog it all, Sam!" Billy came off stage after him, and ran ahead, trying to scoop up all the cones he could on the way.  
  
"I want some! Wait up!" Drew called out after them.  
  
Joel appeared from the rear, "Leave some for me!"  
  
And so the plan of Q's worked, and she breathed a sigh of relief. She had heard the Half Steps joking around before that they would be happy to "sing for ice cream", but she hadn't been sure if they had been serious. Luckily, it seemed that they had.  
  
The doors of the truck slammed closed behind the oblivious boys, who turned around at the noise, realizing, all to late, what fools they had been. Back inside Essex High School a slew of fans and friends waited for the boys to emerge from back stage to sell their upcoming CD. But the boys never did appear.  
  
~  
  
The boys weren't treated too badly, considering the circumstances. They were kept hidden in the basement of one of the gang's houses. This basement is like the video game central. The computer, though falling apart and pieced together from the owner's masterful technology skills, is filled with a mass of video games, the most often used of which was Dance Dance Revolution (as the computer held hundreds, if not thousands, of songs). Also, the room recently got the addition of a mame cabinet, or atleast the controls. Now, this is like the ULTIMATE game machine, and has every video game from the 80s to present day or something crazy like that on it. (to see the room where the Half Steps were held captive, go to basement.html)  
  
So the boys never got too bored, for there was much to entertain them in the basement. Not to mention the bright red paint on the walls was fairly enjoyable for the eyes. They were also fairly well fed, and Q, KP, and the rest of them were all to happy to give them ice cream to their heart's content under one condition. They sang whenever asked, whatever asked. Having their voices admired was nothing new to the group, though usually under slightly different circumstances, so they were willing to oblige. They did love their ice cream.  
  
Surprisingly, the Half Step boys were able to keep in fairly good humor, after the initial shock. They even fell into their normal, wacky, spontaneous selves after the first few days had passed. ("Joel is my hero. I want to be just like Joel when I grow up!" - Billy, after drawing a beard on his face with a black marker.)  
  
Actually, things were going better than planned. The police had investigated, but found nothing other than melted ice cream pools leading out the doors. Their conclusion had been that the boys had merely been afraid of college, and in hopes of living out their childhood dreams of friendship, ran off together to try to make a living by singing. The cop had told the families that they would come to their senses in a few weeks, and return home sheepishly. Thanks to this reasoning, all investigation and searches had been done loosely and carelessly, and for the first few weeks nothing had turned up at all.  
  
That's when Laney had made her mistake. She and Q had been sent out on ice cream duty, and failed to notice the police officer sitting at the table behind her. She took out 15 pints (those boys could really eat!) and walked up to the cash register while humming "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" slightly off rhythm. One of the Half Steps trademark songs, where they sing the song, always one beat ahead of where they should be. She also just happened to be wearing her "Half Steps Groupie" shirt which she had purchased from them.  
  
The police officer was fast. She had had to listen to the Half Steps CD countless time for the investigation, and noticed the song easily. She called Laney over to her.  
  
"That's a nice song your humming, but isn't the beat off a bit?" she asked. "No, that's how it's supposed to be sung. Well, this version," Laney replied.  
  
"You mean the Half Steps version?"  
  
"Yeah," Laney paused, starting to see her error, "I mean no. I mean, yes, I was listening to the CD on the way over here." She tried to regain herself.  
  
"And what might you be needing all that ice cream for?" The officer inquired further.  
  
"Uhm... er..." Laney fumbled, "I'm, uh, having a party tonight. Yeah, that's it, a party."  
  
The officer looked at her suspiciously. She had been in the business long enough to be able to tell when someone is lying. Needless to say, Laney never returned to Q with the ice cream that day.  
  
******END OF FLASHBACK******  
  
"Well, that was how I got here," Laney said, "I guess you guys must've made some slip ups too," and they all nodded that they had.  
  
They looked around the room, and waking up their minds which had slipped into the past they noticed everyone was staring at them with wide eyes. Some even had dropped jaws.  
  
"You... you guys are stalkers?" Magnet asked, looking a bit worried.  
  
"Not just stalkers, kidnappers too," Zigzag added.  
  
"Well... yeah. But it was just for fun," KP responded. At this comment the boys all turned to one another and exchanged concerned glances.  
  
"I think that about brings us to the end of our time tonight," Pendanski broke the silence, not sure of what else to say, "Bedtime!"  
  
***********  
  
The next day's digging continued as normal, though only after an eerily quiet breakfast. Throughout the morning, the girls began to notice that the boys were whispering to one another, which was usually followed by laughter. There were countless fingers pointed in their direction, and ever more eyes darted towards them, and the quickly away.  
  
At the first break of the day, the girls walked up to the boys who were sitting clumped together on the ground.  
  
"Would you guys stop being immature?" KP scowled at them.  
  
"Yeah, I'd listen to her. I hear she's got vicious skill... with ice cream! Haha," Squid commented, to the laughter of all the boys.  
  
"Jackasses," Laney was looking at Magnet now, trying to catch his eye, but he made a point to look away, "Grow up."  
  
"What are you going to do?" Zigzag teased, but not in a friendly voice, "Stalk us?"  
  
More laughter from the boys. Laney and KP did not find this very funny, and stared down at the boys angrily. (Go to digit.html see what they looked like. *Cough* disregard the fact that they are not in their regulation jumpsuits, heh heh).  
  
"Or how about their 4 foot tall leader," Armpit, who towered well above that height, shot at Q.  
  
Her eyes began to water as she replied quietly, "4'10."  
  
Frances was the only one not subjected to direct ridicule, as the boys were not yet comfortable enough with her to supply it. But she had seen enough, and as she walked away with KP, Laney and Q by her side she said very matter-of-factly, "Gee, people here are really mean!"  
  
~  
  
NOTE: phew, ok, so tell me if you enjoyed that I guess. Haha, I hope the pictures added to the experience a bit, if you could figure out how to get them =P. Love, ice cream, and barbershop quartets to all my reviewers - the loves of my life.  
  
Oh, and for a bit of free advertisement for the Half Steps, you can go to www.thehalfsteps.com/ if you feel so inclined. I think you can even hear them sing there. Hooray! =D 


	9. Contemplation

NOTE: Well, It's only been like forever and infinity since I last wrote, eh? Well, on the plus side Holes came out on VHS/DVD during that time. If you haven't seen DVD special features (particularly commentary by the D- Tent boys) you are missing out dearly. HUGE amount of love and thanks to Q who made my last few days so fantastic!! It was GREAT to see you babe, and I've never had so many wickedly hot fictional boys packed into such a short time =) I've finally been reinspired. Also, much love to KP and Emma, whose sense of humor I will always and forever appreciate! Thanks for being so darn cool! Love you! And of course THANK YOU IMMENSLY to all my reviewers, who I wouldn't write without... even though I tend to not write anyway *cough*, but at least the new chapter is here now =D  
  
*****  
  
Another day had passed with the girls segregated from the boys, subjected to the constant ridicule. Dinner that night had been a particularly unpleasant scene, upon which Squid, Armpit, Zigzag, and Caveman (who had had large reservations, but eventually succumbed to peer pressure and the gruff 'encouragement' he received from Armpit and Squid) poorly attempted to imitate a barbershop quartet to the girls as they ate, which ended in Sketch's infamous ankle kicking - the blunt of which fell onto poor Zigzag and Armpit, who had been closest by her.  
  
Everyone lay in their beds a bit restless that night, minds whirling in and out of thought. *cue the playing of the song "Everybody Hurts" by REM*  
  
Armpit's thoughts were mostly bitter as he tenderly rubbed his sore ankles, "That little brat. It's not like I was THAT off key or anything, man. Ow! Crap! It was worth it though, dawg. The looks on their faces." He paused, recalling in his mind their narrowed eyes and scowling mouths. For a second he ALMOST felt something in the pit of his stomach that was reminiscent of the tiniest bit of guilt, but he quickly pushed the feeling aside, "Nah nah! It's funny, *funny*, remember that, man. Pull yourself together! Yeah, it's just a joke. A funny one. You're just hungry." He ended, convincing himself of it.  
  
Zigzag's mind was racing with possibilities, "I can't believe she kicked me. What if she was infected with some virus and was sent here to spread it around and now I've been infected and I'm going to die and have my body eaten by worms in one of those stinkin' holes. Yeah! I bet all those holes we dig are graves... for ourselves! But if I die KP will never get to finish learning guitar... AH! What if KP's infected!? I should warn her. I mean, no... I don't care about KP. She's a dorky little ice cream abusing stalker. I bet you could kill someone with ice cream though. I wonder what KP's favorite ice cream flavor is? I mean, NO! Not thinking about KP... not think about KP... oh crap! If I'm thinking that I'm not thinking about her, does that count as thinking about her?"  
  
Laney was working very hard to act as though she were asleep, in order to keep from having to talk to anyone about the night's events. She knew she was more upset than she should be, afterall, she was usually so good at laughing at herself (as long as it didn't compromise her morals or political beliefs ;) ) so what was different with this time? "It's not like I don't get this kind of jackass, half-kidding, ridicule at home. I mean, hell, I'm friends with Tyler right? It comes along with being 'one of the guys'. Then why the hell is this bothering me? And why the hell won't Magnet, if anyone, stand up for us at least a little bit. And why am I saying the word 'hell' so much?" She refused to admit to herself that the part about Magnet upset her the most, because she didn't want to have to admit to herself anything else she might be thinking about him. So she contented herself with a generalization, "I was starting to like them all, too. I hate boys."  
  
A slight way across the camp grounds in D Tent, Magnet lay trying to keep his mind as much off Laney as she was trying to keep hers off him. Truth be told, he was pretty sick of the whole ordeal. He didn't like making fun of people, really. At least not when it caused this much tension, "Aye! What is my problem? The other guys don't have difficulty with this. Bros before hoes though, right? It's funny, right? I'm not a wuss, right? I swear. Man, why does Laney - er, I mean, *the girls* - why do *the girls* care so much about those stupid boys anyway?? What's so special about them?" he thought bitterly, maybe even, though he would never admit it, with a bit of jealousy. Oh but if Magnet only know what is was about the Half Steps... if only he could have "In The Jungle" sung to him in falsetto in a parking lot... or listen to "Sam, You Made the Pants too Long", complete with commentary. Or if he - *cough* OK, stopping there. Maybe I should continue on with the story, eh? Magnet turned face down into his pillow and wondered silently at the fact that he hadn't had any more contact wit La - er, with the girls in the past few days that a few fleeting moments of eye contact.  
  
Q was lying on her back, staring at the top of G tent, wishing vaguely she had been allowed more time to kick before Mr. Pendanski had pulled her away. Actually, she didn't mind too much because it had given her a golden opportunity to peg Pendanski in the shin. She smiled thinking about it, and then allowed her mind to wander onto greater things, "Wow, look at the way the tent folds. It kind of looks like a horse. No, it looks more like Charlie Conway. But then again what doesn't look like Charlie Conway? Doesn't everything revolve around the Mighty Ducks? If so, would that make Bombay God? HEY! I wonder if I could cut holes in the top of the tent and create my own constellations! I could make one that looks like Charlie Conway! Though I think I'd rather have Guy Germaine staring down at me all night."  
  
She turned towards Laney to tell her about her great, constellation making idea only to find Laney's back turned the other way, apparently in a deep sleep, "I have to remember to tell her in the morning," she paused then, her mind flipping back to its former subject, "No, no, no, Bombay can't be God! The Half-Steps are God. Or Gods. Oh right, the Half Steps - stupid D Tent. Stupid boys. Hey, boys! The Lost Boys... the Coreys!" and so her mind trailed off on yet another tangent.  
  
X-Ray was chillin' on his bed, very close to sleep. In the last moments before he passed into the dream world, his mind was wandering to, of course, the recent events, "I don't know about all this [make] squabbin' up in heah [Brooklyn], but it seems to be bringing the boys together. That's who I gotta look out for, my bros. Yeah, the girls are chill, but I'm cool with whatever my boys decide to do. I'll do it for them," he decided, not allowing himself to question for a moment if maybe the reason he wouldn't stand up to the other D-Tent boys rested more in his insecurity of maintaining the leadership position, as he was neither largest nor strongest, and didn't want to do anything that could bring about a coup.  
  
KP was also feigning sleep (exactly as Laney was, cause, you know, they're like the same person) while her mind raced, "Well, I missed guitar lessons for the second day in a row. I guess they're over and I'll just have to teach myself now," though in the back of her mind she knew this wasn't the part which upset her most about the loss of the lessons, "What jerks. JERKS! Though Zigzag was kind of cute when he was singing. God, what a voice that boy has! Mmm. But he's a j-e-r-k. Cuteness does NOT make up for disrespect to the Half Steps!" She frowned into the dark at this mix up of emotions, "I hate boys."  
  
Back in D-Tent, Caveman, not the most self-confident of the boys, was curled up on his cot, still shivering in embarrassment, "I can't believe they made me sing in front of girls. I feel like such a loser! Then again, they did ask *me* to do it. So that means they must consider me one of the posse now. I have real friends! Ha, if people at home could see me now! Well, now as in with friends, not now as in singing. Yup, moving up in the world; got a gang," he smiled smugly to himself, "Still, I wouldn't mind getting to know the girls. Though tonight probably didn't help. But yeah! What would the kids back at home say if I got a girlfriend!" he continued to smile, and played around with fantasies before slipping off to sleep.  
  
Squid was sprawled out across his entire bed, arms and legs flailed over the edges. He wasn't too concerned with the happenings of the night, but all the same they raced through his mind momentarily, "Haha, man this is fun! Too easy! I mean, ice cream! Come on! Pretty darn badass there. Those guys sound kind of wussy too, I mean... barbershop quartets? Though I must admit my debut as a barbershop singer was pretty hot. Haven't talked to Q in a while though. Hmm... ah, well. It's worth it for a good joke. I'll deal with it later, whatever."  
  
Frances was very confused by this point as she had arrived just as all the teasing began. The other girls had tried to inform her that D-Tent wasn't *really* so bad, usually, but from what she'd seen she figured they were just trying to soften her arrival up for her, because the boys sure didn't seem friendly, "Argh, if I was Buffy I'd show them a thing or two! No, if I was Buffy, then that would mean Wesley was real, so I'd probably be stalking him. Well, I'm kind of already stalking him aren't I? Aww, stubble and English accents. That's brilliant! Unlike those boys. Well, all except that little one. He doesn't seem too mean. Just quiet. Ahh! I can't believe I can't watch TV here. Well, there's cracked broken one. But no Buffy, or Charmed, or Smallville! But at least I'm away from school. Oh no! School! Homework! I left my homework at home! I'll never be able to do it! What will I do?!" the workaholic feared, not bothering to think that, as she was stuck at Camp Greenlake for the next forever, her work would really not matter.  
  
And finally Zero was lying on his side, eyes open, staring at the shape of the tent fabric. His head was full of many thoughts, all racing around as usual, but this was not visible on his face, and had anyone felt like looking at him in the dark they would have only seen a very calm and cool expression, thinking of apparently nothing. He did not wish to indulge in the stupidity of human curiosity by providing his thoughts to be written out in this section of the story, so they will, therefore, remain only inside his own mind.  
  
*******  
  
The next morning the campers all slumped out to the shovel library and the overly disgusting tortillas that the counselors called breakfast. All them were tired, seeing at it was 4 in the morning, but none more so than the kids of G and D Tents. Most of them hadn't slept at all, and the ones who did had not had a nice fitful rest, as they were usually used to from being so tired after a hard days work, but a jerky, unsettling sleep. The members of both tents kept sneaking guilty glances at one another that were filled with regret, anger, and amusement all at once. But still, they didn't say anything to one another.  
  
"Now, I know this isn't very conventional," Mr. Sir started, to the surprise of everyone, "But we've got a new camper who will be joining us for digging today. We wouldn't normally bring someone new here in the morning, but we didn't have much choice. She traveled all night to be here... something about how she wouldn't stop singing so they had to send her away quickly because she was causing an uproar at the detainment center. Anyway," Mr. Sir was cut off by Pendanski who had walked up behind the campers.  
  
"I'd like you to meet your new camper," he began, and every face turned a full 180 to stare at him and a pretty girl with blondish, chin-length hair and a friendly smile (particularly friendly for such an early time in the morning), "Emma."  
  
For the first time in two days the girls faces lit up with happiness and excitement, and they rushed to the front of the crowd, "Fifi!!!" they exclaimed.  
  
She greeted them all with firm hugs (has it been mentioned that Emma is one of *the best* hug givers in the entire world?) and then looked around curiously, "Man, why is everyone so glum?!"  
  
"Dude, it's like, 4 a.m." Laney responded.  
  
"OK, OK, enough of that touchy feely crap. Let's move out!" Mr. Sir barked, and the hordes of delinquent youth marched outward towards what was expected to be another long, tiring day. 


	10. What Do We Need?

Author's Note: Aye! I swear I hate writer's block! But I ACTUALLY wrote a new chapter for once. Hooray!! And it's all thanks to YOU. Yes, YOU who read this story. So I've decided to do some shout outs this time, so here goes, kids!  
  
Cake Eater - I miss you, dawg! Bug, you like, are my inspiration for life, haha. Thanks, as always, for the awesome review. Yeah, it's nice to have our whole little crew (you, me, kp, fifi) together again... and Frances of course! Reading your review makes me realize how utterly incomprehensible our vocabulary is, which reminded me how much I love you! Come back to us again sometime or there will be REAL make squabbin' up in heah!  
  
Rain - Yeah, the thought chapter was kind of just to get me back into writing. (Great job that did considering it took me another month to write this chapter... d'oh!) But I got here eventually. Thanks always for the encouragement, babe!  
  
Drowchild - Thanks, as always, for the awesome reviews that keep me writing! I'm glad you enjoy the story even if I'm too lazy to EVER update it (besides right now! Hooray!). Yeah, the boys were just being jerks about them stalking, and using ice cream, and barber shop quartets. So what if it doesn't really make sense? Neither does most of this story right, so we can all pretend =)  
  
Dollar Bill - haha, nice work with those quotes there dear. You got it all in eventually =) Thanks for always being my support, and for remaining sane in this crazy universe of high school. I'm glad you enjoyed my interpretation of your mind, haha, I'm always worried people are going to be like, "hey! I'm not like that!" I love you always! You're the best for reading my crap!  
  
Kryscrossed - Har har har! Thanks for such a hot review dude! How dull would the world be without randomness? Or Bob Dole for that matter? And we all know the world would collapse in on itself were it not for the Newsies... well, I know it at least! Yeah, so tell your... uh, clone twin I saw howdy... ;-P  
  
Lillia E - You have no idea how happy your review made me! Yeah, it's pretty disturbing when you know what's REALLY going on behind the food you eat, particularly the meats and such. Ick! Those poor animals! Are you vegetarian trying to convert to vegan? Cause if not it's sometimes helpful to be first, and then go vegan. It's less of a leap or something. *cough* anyway, not meaning to rant here, but totally keep educating people! You rock! And yes, Laney most def has more opinions to come, hehe, I'll work them in there some how...  
  
OK, so onto the story!!  
  
~  
  
Emma provided a new spark of energy that the camp had been lacking the past few days. Not only was she an exuberant digger, but she even had enough energy to SING while she dug - pulling songs from everywhere. Sweet melodies such as Ave Verum Corpus from their former chorus class (which brought back fond memories for the girls of a crazy woman with flipping hair throwing chalk and jumping around on coffee highs. They all smiled.) Song from musicals - plays they had done at school (Fiddler on the Roof, Hello Dolly, and, Bug forbid, Bye Bye Birdie) as well as Broadway hits (RENT, JCS, Newsies). Whenever anyone knew a song, they'd join in with her. Whenever they didn't they'd listen along pleasantly to her gorgeous soprano. All in all, it made the morning fly by, and took the campers until their afternoon break to even remember that they were supposed to be mad at one another.  
  
And then memory struck like a hammer. As they walked up to the truck together the cheerful humming that they had all been entertaining in the back of their throats subsided, and KP, The Hotness, Sketch, and Frances huddled together at the back of the line, glowering at the boys who sneered back.  
  
Only Fifi continued to have a bounce in her step (which was quite impressive considering it was her first day of hole digging!) as she lined up with her friends. Soon enough, though, she noticed the mood change in the air and quieted herself down to look curiously at her friends, then the boys, then back to her friends again. They all sulked angrily back to their half finished holes.  
  
Now, Fifi, a naturally cheerful and wonderfully friendly person, was none too happy with the state of things and felt it hear duty to set them right.  
  
She walked into the center of the digging area and proclaimed loudly enough for everyone to hear, "Hey guys! Know what we need?!"  
  
All of a sudden, from about a hundred yards away where the A-Tent boys were digging, Mush jumped out of his hole, throwing his shovel to the ground. His gorgeous calves were glinting in the sunlight below the rolled up legs of his jumpsuit.  
  
He yelled loudly enough for the sound to carry all the way over to where D and G tent were settled, "WE NEED A GOOD ASS-ASS-I-NA-TION!" while completing a perfectly executed pelvic thrust directly on the "na."  
  
"Why does he always *do* that?" Stanly wondered, quite ignored.  
  
"That's worth a good dollar!" KP pointed out.  
  
"We need an earthquake or a war," Q continued.  
  
"How 'bout a crooked politician?" Laney offered.  
  
At that Q, KP, and Emma picked up clods of dirt and chucked them at her, yelling, "Dude, you're never going to get laid!"  
  
And that seemed to end it, so the girls, minus Emma, went back to their respective holes. But KP was done, and she slipped in slyly under her breath, "Unless it's by a whore." Laney shot a bright smile in her direction.  
  
Fifi shook her head to clear it, "No, no. Wait I *meant* to say was that we need..." she hesitated, looking towards A-Tent, but Mush had long since disappeared back into his hole, "... it to, um, dance!"  
  
She hadn't really known what she'd been planning on saying, but once the word dance popped out she realized how silly it sounded. Yet she was resourceful, so she decided to just wing it from there.  
  
"...dance?" Caveman questioned.  
  
"Yeah! You know, liven things up a bit!" Emma cheerfully walked over to Caveman's hole and offered her hand to him - an invitation to dance.  
  
Now, before Stanley had come to Camp Green Lake he had never had many friends. This made him desperate ever since he arrived there to prove himself and fit in. To be one of the guys. That meant taking the guy's side no matter what, even in this battle with G-Tent.  
  
And yet, the other things Stanley had never had was much luck with girls... or any luck for that matter. He had never had a girlfriend, and any interaction with the opposite sex had always ended in stuttering, humiliating disaster. And now here was a girl reaching her hand out to *him*, of any of the D-Tent boys she could have picked. It was too much, so though the strings of loyalty tugged at him, he reached up and took her hand, using it to help himself out of his hole.  
  
Multiple people gasped. A few sighed. Many breathed in deeply, no realizing that they had been holding their breaths. All truth be told, Emma was probably the most shocked and relieved of anyone. The awkwardness of standing there, sticking out her hand, waiting for Caveman as he struggled with his internal conflict has begun to make her nervous.  
  
As soon as he took her hand, though, she snapped out of it. She instantly began thinking back to the last dance she had attended (a drag ball!) and concentrated on picking a song to sing. She contented herself with the decision of Cyndi Lauper's "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun."  
  
As she broke into song, she started to spin around Caveman, dancing and grooving to her own beats. Caveman, as much as he tried to prevent it, turned a bright new shade of red.  
  
He had been thinking so hard about the fact that a *girl* was holding her hand out to him, he had completely forgotten that accepting would mean he'd have to *dance*! He didn't want to let Fifi down though, so he tried his best, which was an awkward bobbing from side to side, with the occasional swing of an arm and nod of the head.  
  
Everyone else just looked on, speechless. What the hell were they doing?! Then again... it did kind of look like fun... but no! They all forced themselves to look away - some feigning thirst and grabbing for their canteens to provide a distraction, other reaching for their shovels and trying to continue with their day's work.  
  
Emma was a bid discouraged, so she slowly let the song fade out as she stopped her dancing. She turned to Stanley, "Well, thanks for the dance..." she trailed off, raising her voice in question.  
  
"Caveman," he complied, happy to tell her his name.  
  
"Caveman," she repeated (using a nice tip from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy: repeat a name when it's told to you to better remember it), "Guess we better finish those holes," she smiled and walked away, Caveman's eyes watching her, his face full of embarrassment and elation, his mind screaming, "Woah! A girl!"  
  
Emma sighed as she returned to work. So she hadn't solved the problem, but at least she had tried. She even made a small dent, breaking the ice with that one boy, Caveman. And hey, if nothing else, she decided, she had planted a seed in their minds; given them something to thing about.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Magnet ran to catch up to Laney as she headed towards the Wreck room, grabbing her arm and spinning her to face him.  
  
"Hey," he stammered.  
  
She eyed him curiously, that stated as coldly as she could muster, "Hey."  
  
"I'm sorry for the way," he started, stumbling his words over each other.  
  
"Forget it," Laney averted her eyes and began to turn away, be he grabbed her arm and pulled her back again.  
  
"Aye, you're difficult," he muttered.  
  
She let out a loud, "HA," though it lacked much humor, "This from the boy who's refused to make eye contact with me for the past week!"  
  
"Well... that's what I'm trying to apologize for! Geez!" he tried hard to stay calm.  
  
"You're not doing a very good job of it. What would the guys think if they knew you were here talking to me, huh?" she spoke maliciously.  
  
"I don't care what the guys think," he told her.  
  
"Really?" she asked, with more than just a hint of sarcasm.  
  
"Really!" he tried to convince her.  
  
But Laney would have none of it, "Yeah, just like you didn't care what they thought for the past few days, right?"  
  
"I *said* I didn't!" he was getting exasperated.  
  
"Yeah, but that's not what I've been seeing... and actions speak louder than words, Buddy!"  
  
Now he was more than just slightly ticked. He was trying to apologize after all! For some reason, her calling him Buddy was the last straw.  
  
"Actions, eh?" he steamed.  
  
"Look at that, the boy is listening!" Laney sneered, mockingly, "Let's give him a round of - " but she never finished for Magnet had leaned forward (and down of course, considering The Hotness's vertical challenge) and caught her mouth, mid-sentence, in an angry kiss.  
  
"What does *that* say then?" he asked while pulling away, his voice getting softer and more timid the more he spoke as his angry passion drained out of him and was replaced by nervous embarrassment.  
  
Laney, too, had lost the anger and was stuck in a state of shock. Her first instinct was to run, but she knew better than that thanks to the experience of her friends... oh, let's call them Connie and Averman.  
  
But before Laney had time to think of an appropriate response a catcall ("Ow! Ow!") followed by a long whistle was heard. Magnet and The Hotness turned quickly towards to Wreck Room just in time to see Armpit wink at them from the porch before ducking through the door.  
  
The two felt the heat rising in their cheeks, but the embarrassment wasn't over yet. A crazily tall and lanky boy from A-Tent, who always wore a baseball cap, had been walking past, and he called out, "Better watch it, Hotness, Bush just passed the law banning certain kinds of abortion. Who knows where that will lead? Damn conservatives. Hey, I'm a liberal now!" He ended cheerfully before walking away.  
  
Laney smiled briefly, "We've taught you well, Brock!" before scowling at the government's advance to trample on a woman's rights. Laney, so impassioned by political thoughts, forgot to be embarrassed. Magnet on the other hand was now a shade of red even brighter than his sunburn.  
  
After a moment, The Hotness cooled the political fire that was raging in her mind, and decided to finally end the awkwardness. She turned back to Magnet and a smile slowly appeared on her face, "I missed you, kid!" she punched him on the arm.  
  
Breathing a sigh of relief, he grabbed her in a hug around the neck and ruffled her dusty hair.  
  
They walked into the Wreck Room like that, together, to the surprise of the girls and boys of G and D Tents - all except Armpit that is.  
  
Twitch looked up from his spot on the floor where he had been trying to convince Zigzag of the broken state of the TV, to no avail, "Wait, wait!" he cried, "Do we not hate each other any more?"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
AUTHORS NOTE: Ok! There you go! Chapter 10 is over and done with. Finally! Thanks for reading, as always... much love! 


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